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at the end of my rope...

29K views 189 replies 52 participants last post by  Suzi 
#1 ·
... hey guys.
It's been a rough couple of months for us with Tillie and her health.
She has developed this horrible trembling that happens frequently, we can no longer take her in the car, she is a nervous WRECK in the car. and now she has started trembling at all other times of the day as well. I have taken her to the vet, he can't find anything wrong. She had the infection/crystals in her urine about 2 months ago... Honestly, she is stressing me out so much.
She isn't the same dog. I don't know what is going on.
I have been thinking and I thought maybe she just needs more one on one time, more attention as I have been busier than usual recently. So, over the past fews days I have been making a huge point of playing games, training, playing fetch, etc. I thought maybe it was helping as she has seemed happier today... Well, tonight, she pee'd on my sons bed. She hasn't done that since her infection. My husband is IRATE. insists it is behavioral and because she had an infection when we got her pet insurance, it won't cover any urinary issues. We can't afford another vet bill, he says business as 'usual' and that we have plans and that she can't interfere with our plans.
I fear if things aren't resolved soon, he may make me rehome her.
I can't believe I am even confessing all of this. Tillie has always been my light, my companion, our joy... and something is wrong. I have been saying it for weeks and weeks and no one will listen to me. The kids insist they hate her .... she has become fearful and aggressive. I KNOW she has to be in pain, something is seriously wrong, yet nothing can be found ... I haven't wanted to come here and tell you all what has been happening because I feel like I have failed. I have failed Tillie, I have failed myself and my kids.
I just don't know what to do. There is something wrong, I know it. For her to pee on the bed again tonight. I know she has an infection or the crystals are back ... she is trying to TELL me something. I want to take her to the vet tomorrow, but we have out of town plans and because of her recent fear of the car we can't take her with us, so a friend is going to come over mid day to let her out and play with her for a bit, but how can I leave her knowing there is something wrong and that she needs to go to the vet.. and then we run into Christmas.... my husband insists that we have plans and that Tillie isn't going to change those plans and that we can't afford another vet bill.
I don't know why I am telling you all this, I guess I just needed to vent to those that I know understand my heartbreak and frustration. I just don't know what to do and I miss my little girl so much... I haven't seen her smile in months....
 
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#89 ·
yes. breaks my heart in so many ways.
The other day the kids and I were in Barnes and Noble and the therapy group I was looking into joining was there doing Christmas wrapping as a fund raiser, with thier dogs and I had the horrible realization that at this point it will never happen for us. Those dogs were so calm and confident and Tillie has deteriorated so much in the past 2 months she rarely leaves the house anymore because it stresses her SO much. breaks me heart. and I can't imagine she's very happy either.
 
#91 ·
Tammy, Tillie is still a young dog. I guess I would be very surprised if what is going on is incontinence, although I know it is not unheard of. Augie's peeing on the rug has not been 'small amounts'. Try not to stress over her accidents and let the antibiotics have a chance to work, get her in for a recheck and further testing and go from there. It is my feeling that Tillie can't have gone from the happy dog you have described in the not too distant past, to the dog she is now without it being a medical issue/illness. Just as with humans, I am sure there is a huge variance with the way dogs may react to illness as well as different thresholds of pain. And she is no doubt frightened and doesn't understand why she doesn't feel right and is confused as to why the attitude of some members of her family have changed toward her. Augie doesn't seem to get nasty or aggressive or shake or show any signs of pain - he sort of gets quiet and lays around. Tillie must be getting some fluids from the liquid you are adding to her meals, but if you are concerned she isn't getting enough, the vet can inject fluid under her skin on her back. That is what our vet did with Augie the first time he got UTI and the crystals. And, like I mentioned in a previous post, if she is locked in a crate at night, and has to potty, of course she is going to pee in her sleeping area, whether she wants to or not.

My heart goes out to you, Tammy. I am so sorry you are having this worry over Tillie and hope that she is SOON on the mend.
 
#95 ·
It is my feeling that Tillie can't have gone from the happy dog you have described in the not too distant past, to the dog she is now without it being a medical issue/illness. Just as with humans, I am sure there is a huge variance with the way dogs may react to illness as well as different thresholds of pain.
I agree. This has just come on too suddenly, and is affecting her in too many different ways for me to believe there isn't a physical basis to it. But it may take patience, time, and some sleuth work to figure out exactly what's going on.

Tillie must be getting some fluids from the liquid you are adding to her meals, but if you are concerned she isn't getting enough, the vet can inject fluid under her skin on her back. That is what our vet did with Augie the first time he got UTI and the crystals.
If she needs it often enough, the vet can even set you up with the fluids and needles to do it yourself... it's not hard. We had VERY elderly cat who needed fluids regularly through her last 18 months of life. We just gave them to her at home every evening. She didn't even mind the needle.
 
#92 ·
Thank you Linda! so glad I am not going through this alone!!

Well, the sun is out here and the kids and I went for a walk with Tillie. I brought treats to encourage her along ... she did great!!! She was looking up at me eyes shining, smiling and trotting along like the sweet girl I know she is. Seriously, I almost cried several times. I never wanted the walk to end. Although I didn't want to push her. We walked for about 20-30 minutes and she loved every second!!! I feel like this was the encouragement we BOTH needed that she IS still in there that she WANTS to be herself again and is trying so hard. The kids were overjoyed to have thier 'old Tillie' back ... she even had the "Zoomies" when we got home!! I'm welling up just remembering her on our walk, looking up at me, hair blowing in the breeze, smiling. :D
I've missed that smile so much.

I have hope that we are on the right track. And I AM going to be doing all of the bloodwork and another urinalysis/culture once this 2 week round of antibiotics is done.
thanks for always being here for me. and Tillie. :grouphug:
 
#96 ·
That's great, Tammy! Also try VERY hard to stay calm about the situation yourself. Just like kids (or even moreso), dogs pick up on their own owners being worried and upset. If YOU appear calm and confident, it will be easier for her, and you'll find that by WORKING on the "calm, confident demeanor", you will start FEELING less upset about the situation too. Think of it as a puzzle to be worked out methodically, but where you KNOW there IS an answer. Not some scary, mysterious, insurmountable problem.

BTW, even if you were to find that she she is incontinent, there are good drugs that can be used to help control it, or in a worst case scenario, you learn to manage it.

There is a woman who competes in Rally around here who has a Corgi who is paralyzed from the middle of his back on. He has no movement in his hind legs, not can he eliminate on his own. Now THAT might seem like an insurmountable problem, but not for them! The dog has been like this for 5 years. He has a cart, and happily trundles along with that, even playing in the yard with her other Corgis. She has to "express" him into a diaper several times a day, but they've figured it out and it works for them! As I said, he even compete in APDT Rally, where a dog can have exercise modifications for disabilities. Obviously, he can't jump with the cart, so he goes through the standards, where the jump would be instead. Everything else, he does amazingly well, considering that he has to figure out how to get the cart into position as well as his body!

I guess my point is that if this lady was able to figure out how to deal with this really devastating injury, I have complete faith that, in time and with patience, you'll figure out what's going on with Tillie and have your wonderful, happy companion back, one way or another!:hug:
 
#93 ·
hang tough Tammy, patience is indeed a virtue.
 
#97 ·
Thanks Karen! Patience is hard for me, not a virtue I have been given in abundance, let's say that. :pound: Having everyone behind me here on the forum and the glimpse of my smiling girl today has me more determined than ever to get her back. and I will. somehow. someway. some day. My gut tells me she will be okay soon. she HAS to be.
 
#103 ·
thanks for checking in with us!!
no new found accidents, so that's good. Her trembling seems to be getting less and less. She only seems to do it first thing in the morning.
I do need to take my son to a Dr's appt this morning, it will be the first time I have left Tillie in nearly a week... a tad nervous about that...
 
#104 ·
I hope Tillie just keeps improving, Tammy. Last night was our best night with Augie. He went from 10 pm to 5:30 am without having to go out. The vet had given him a long-acting shot Thurs before Christmas. I did not see any improvement for about three days, except in his behavior. He seemed a little more spunky. Then the times between having to go out to potty started lengthening, and he is almost back to normal now, a week later, with most of the improvement in the past couple of days. I hope Tillie will do the same! And I hope she does well while you have to be gone this morning.
 
#105 ·
I haven't been on the board much lately and am sorry to hear you are having trouble with Tillie. Gryff gets the shakes too. I call them the shakies. The vet was very blase about it and just said that it happens with small white dogs sometimes. It's not too much of an issue with us, but I have heard of people having great success with those vests.


I'm glad you and Tillie had a nice afternoon. Hopefully there will be many more of them.
 
#106 ·
we were gone for about 2 hrs this morning (Tillie was in her crate with her Kong) and was peacefully sleeping as always when we got home. My daughter let her out right away and I took her outside to go potty. She pee'd right away and seems to be doing well today.
We have the hallway blocked off indefinitly due to her frequent (to us!) accidents ...
We are all starting to see glimpses of her sweet self!! Come Monday it will have been a week on the 2 antibiotics...
I do worry about when school starts up and the busy-ness picks up again... I can't help but worry. I'm a mom. It's what I DO.:sorry:
 
#113 ·
Sounds like things are getting a bit better with Tillie and I can tell you are happier and a bit relieved as you are back to posting on the threads, Tammy. I'm so happy for all of you, especially Tillie. Keep your chin up. She'll get there!
 
#114 ·
thanks! yes, we are all getting more postive by the day!

Today everyone wanted to go to the snow. I don't feel Tillie is ready for that yet, OR to be left at home alone for that long. And she TOLD us so, by repeatedly jumping in the van as they were getting ready to go! :pound: Like oh HECK no, you are NOT leaving me behind!! :D I had to PROVE to her that *I* wasn't going by sitting in my recliner while they all got ready and packed up! After my husband and kids left I decided to surprise Tillie by taking HER 'bye-bye'!! She was SOOOOOO excited, yipping, thrashing her toys around, hopping all over. THAT's my girl!! Man, I have missed her.
Anywho, we just went uptown to make some returns to a couple stores where she rode happily in her stroller occasionally getting loves from some stranger that just couldn't resist her. :D It was so wonderful to spend one on one time with her again. It's probably been nearly 2 months since we have gone shopping together... she just wasn't herself and I didn't want to push her.
I know we have a long way to go, along with lots of medical testing, but I have definitly seen her turn a major corner in the past couple of days and am SO very glad I listened to my gut (which is ALWAYS right) and not to my husband. :pound:
 
#115 ·
That is FANTASTIC, Tammy!!! Just be aware that from what I've been told, you can have a UTI AND crystals at the same time. The antibiotics will clear up the infection, but if you don't get to the root cause of the crystals, the problem will keep coming back. So don't let up on getting to the bottom of thing!!!

Glad to hear she is feeling so much better, though!!!
 
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