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New Havanese owner needs reassurance

83K views 815 replies 95 participants last post by  Lalla 
#1 ·
Hi, I have been reading this site for awhile waiting to find my Havanese. Well, I got her today.

She is 2 1/2 years old and came from a breeder who said she made it quite clear she did not want to be a mom. Apparently she teased the males and then at the critical moment, would roll onto her back and wave her feet in the air, thus making it all impossible for the male dog.

Anyway, she is here next to me. My problem is she will stay exactly where I put her. She won't walk around outside or inside. She won't eat or drink. She did pee once about 3 hours ago when I brought her home.

Supposedly she is not housebroken and she was supposed to be socialized by owner's children. I was told she is shy and takes awhile to warm up to strangers. Quite un - Hav - like, right? She does not seem to know her name.

She is adorable, white with black ears and some black spots on her back.

I think she was traumatized by the 2 1/2 hour car ride here. She vomited in the car in her crate on the way.

Do I just keep talking to her and keep watching her to see if she needs to go outside? Please talk to me.
 
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#739 ·
Ahhhh Kay, I can't even imagine how hard this might be for you. I have a hard time thinking about this. I feel she might be better with your friend. She might be better off with a more quiet pace of life. Dogs of her nature, do better with less outside influences. Your friend sounds wonderful. I have to go but I'm not sure I will be able to sleep now. Talk later, God bless.
 
#741 ·
I am appreciating your thoughts re rehoming Maggie

Just like with my close friends here at home, I am sorry to cause sadness or pain for those on this board thinking of my situation. What I most love about those closest to me is that not one is tippy toeing around what is happening. I love how straight they are with me.

Maggie just had her breakfast and danced her way out the door just now to do her business. I love her energy in the early morning with her twirl arounds and soft woofs.
 
#742 ·
It is wonderful that she can be such a comfort to you, especially considering all you have done for her. You two really have a special relationship.

I agree that it doesn't hurt to let her experience both, and see if one feels more comfortable for her than the other. My gut, however, agrees with Dave, that she is the type of dog who would probably do better in the quieter setting. It's wonderful, though that you have two viable options to choose from. That has to be a great comfort.
 
#743 ·
I too am so sorry for the situation you are in. And I agree with both Dave & Karen. Having read the whole thread I think your friend's home would be the best place for her. Also please remember there is always Havanese Rescue Inc that you can turn to for rehomimg Maggie. They have foster homes that know how to help each Havanese that comes into HRI- and they are loving caring homes.
 
#745 ·
What wonderful news for you and Maggie. I have two rescues, Shadow and Jesse (James) and it took a very long time for them to truly bond with us. Now they follow us everywhere we go. But, like Maggie, they hate car rides, pant, whine, cry and throw up! So we don't go very far; four miles to the vet and two to the groomer! Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving with Maggie.
 
#746 ·
Kay,
I always keep up with your journey with Maggie. Our rescue, Brookie, has also been a source of challenge, frustration, joy, and hope. We love her unconditionally for who she is as you love Maggie. I'm so glad that you have such good friends and family to support you through this difficult time. I agree with many here that Maggie would do better with your friend in a calmer environment. Can she gradually spend more time with her? My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Joyce
 
#748 ·
I just caught up on this thread. Maggie is such a pretty little girl. I am so sorry for what you are going through. Is your friend that wants Maggie the same one who sprung her from the vet when you were in the hospital? If so, she sounded wonderful with her. It sounds like Maggie has made huge strides. She is very lucky to have landed with you. Please know you both will remain in my thoughts and prayers.
 
#750 ·
I have to count this as one of my favorite love stories ever, the whole story and the way you told it were wonderful! I am so sad that you will have to find a new home for her but it sounds like you have a couple of good choices. I agree with the others that said to try both to see which is more comfortable for her. I feel sorry that you have to do this, I know if it were me I would worry about Ozzie more than myself. Who knows how much they really understand? Maybe at this point you could let her take care of you for a bit? Please take care, my prayers are with you both :)
 
#751 ·
Yes, my friend Hazel of over 35 years is the one who sprung Maggie from the vet boarding. So glad the vet called her.

Hazel has a lovely quiet home with boyfriend (ooh, what a dumb word for partner in life). She had Lil Dude, a cat who talks to me on the phone. lol. Maggie likes the counter cats at the vet and at the groomer. They have an enormous yard which Hazel said Maggie ran around in exploring.
 
#752 ·
Hazel has a great idea. Maggie usually makes herself scarce when I have company. But Hazel was with me when I got Maggie and held her while I completed the transaction.

Hazel thinks it would be great if she and I and Maggie cuddled on the couch at both my home and her home. Her thinking is that maybe Maggie can latch on to the idea that Hazel is a loved, trusted friend of mine. I am willing to try this with maybe a few bits of chicken at the end each time. lol
 
#753 ·
Kay, I was so happy to read your initial post about Maggie's progress. I know it has been a long road and I'm sure you were thrilled to see that all the work and love you have put into her has made a difference.

I was sad to read on about your current situation and having to re-homing Maggie. I know that you will do what is best for her as you have from the day you got her.

I have missed hearing about how you both are doing. I hope you will be able to keep us posted as you make these hard decisions. Prayers going out for both of you. :)
 
#754 ·
Kay, that is a great idea. And I'd imagine that Maggie had already attached feelings to Hazel since she was there when you first picked Maggie up. Snuggle time and chicken would have to be a good thing, right? And the fact that Maggie likes some cats would be a comfort to her, too.

I know that when I picked up a puppy years ago, and my mom held her while I drove, that puppy always had special feelings for my mom (who doesn't even particularly like dogs, ha!)
 
#755 ·
That sounds like a good plan, Kay. Perhaps after doing the snuggle thing a few times, you could leave her for an overnight pj party with Hazel, then work up to a weekend. By doing it gradually, it may help Maggie to form a deeper bond with Hazel and adjust easier. I am so sorry to hear your sad tale. It brought years to my eyes. I will pray for you and Maggie, as well.
 
#756 ·
I think Pam has told me that this is more or less what she does if she rehomes an older dog. (retired breeder) She'll have the person visit quite a few times, take the dog for walks, take the dog for an overnight, then a weekend.. by then they are typically comfortable enough with the other "trusted" people that the transition is much easier.
 
#757 ·
I haven't read enough of this thread to be up on exactly what's going on, but I just thought I'd stick this in.

New owner needs to come get the dog. It should not be taken and left by it's last owner. The dog must go willingly with the new owner. If it's taken and left, it may never stop looking for it's old owner.
 
#759 ·
Yesterday

My dear friend, Hazel, took me and Maggie to the groomer. I introduced Hazel as Maggie's future owner. Then I cried. Then Hazel said but not today, Kay.

Maggie was picked up by Hazel later in the day. Hazel said she put her on the seat next to her and talked to her and petted her all the way home.

Maggie never shook in the car and was very frisky and ready to claim her back yard for a few minutes before coming in.

I love how Hazel deals with her. She just treats Maggie like her beloved late Yorkie who was a velcro dog. I like the changes I am seeing with Maggie.

Latest news is a real bummer. Two of my doctors, radiolgist and eye doc have said I can no longer drive. I am such an independent woman, and my wheels have always been important to me. But I am not willing to risk accident to any other person or myself. So, for now, I am not driving. Yesterday, I stomped around the house at this news even though I agree.

Acceptance for me does mean I do not have to like the facts. This has worked so well for me in the past that I know eventually my anger will pass.

Hope all have a great day. Will try to get a pic of Maggie to post
 
#760 ·
Hazel sounds like a diamond. It is good to read how well Maggie does with her, and I'm sure that is a huge relief for you. For later, but not for now. Hazel is right, and what a sweet friend.

It would be very difficult to giving up driving, but you are doing the right thing by turning in your keys, for now, at least.

Hugs to you, and a wave to Maggie!
 
#761 ·
Kay I have not driven in weeks. And the few times I drove before I just quit was to the office and the grocery just a mile from me. It is a pain. I have to get someone to take me everywhere and my secretary quit because she didn't like having to bring mail out to my house and do the deposits, etc; but her last words were she didn't think she should have to get my meds from the pharmacist either. So my husband is doing all of that now. But if I get stronger and can get off some of the meds that are making me feel like I am losing my mind, I will be able to go back to the office. My eyes won't get any better though. I don't know what is wrong with you, but whatever it is, the forum members will pray for you, I know because they did for me.
 
#762 ·
Kay I have not driven in weeks. And the few times I drove before I just quit was to the office and the grocery just a mile from me. It is a pain. I have to get someone to take me everywhere and my secretary quit because she didn't like having to bring mail out to my house and do the deposits, etc; but her last words were she didn't think she should have to get my meds from the pharmacist either. So my husband is doing all of that now. But if I get stronger and can get off some of the meds that are making me feel like I am losing my mind, I will be able to go back to the office. My eyes won't get any better though. I don't know what is wrong with you, but whatever it is, the forum members will pray for you, I know because they did for me.
 
#763 ·
Feel so bad for you Kay. I chatted online with Hazel. She sounds wonderful. You have made a good choice and are very lucky to have her take Maggie. Please keep us posted on how you are doing. You are such a great person, Hugs Dave.
 
#764 ·
Your stories bring tears to my eyes, but I am so glad that Maggie seems to be bonding with Hazel. It must be very hard on you to have to give her up, but it appears that she will be in good hands with someone who adores her as much as you do. Hang in there.
 
#765 ·
New pic and update

I recently was hospitalized from Dec. 24 and got out Dec. 31.

While there, Maggie stayed with Hazel and Scott. On the day I got to go home, Hazel picked me up and we stopped at her house to get Maggie.

I walked in and Maggie was about 20 feet away. I called her to me, getting down on the floor. Keep in mind she never comes to me or anyone else.

Maggie saw me and started wagging her tail. She wagged her tail for me! That's a big deal. Then she ran to me and licked my face. Big, big deal. I held her on my lap in the car and was so happy to know this neurotic little dog knows to whom she belongs.
 

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