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post #1 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 01:35 PM Thread Starter
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Update on Boo Boo and thoughts on good byes

I have not been on the forum much or the internet in general for about 3 weeks, sometimes I have got to peek in for a few minutes to catch up. The forum is something I do for me, a small thing that brings me a lot of pleasure. To be able to sit comfortably at home or be in some other city in the world and still connect with Havanese, and pet people at least half as crazy is beyond cool. So many shared joys, achievements, sorrows, milestones in our lives and always our happy little clowns ever ready to participate, to be our audience, or distract us from our worries or sorrows with their playful antics, cute faces and oft wagging tails.

I use to think as a writer I was not good at the middle, the beginnings and the ends I do well, I now know it is the endings I have trouble with or perhaps it’s the concept of good bye. I was always the kid that wanted to know what happened to Cinderella after she married the prince. What was her life like? What does happily ever after mean? Even as an adult with many life experiences I still have trouble letting go and accepting the final good by. Some may remember in Feb. I wrote about my Lhasa boy’s diagnosis of Dilated Cardiomyopathy he has been managed medically with good results until three weeks ago, he went into renal failure due to over management of his heart. Boo Boo’s aging kidneys could not maintain the load his medications were creating. After stopping all meds except the Enacard putting him on Hills k/d he was boarded at the vet for five days things improved. On Sat. night Boo Boo woke up and started walking like a spider with a arched back, yelping loudly he collapsed. The ride to the Vet with his moaning in my arms was terrifying; I thought this was going to be good bye. Adrenalin pumping Boo Boo rallied by the time we made it to the Vet. Boo Boo is back on prednisone for the inflammation in the discs in his back and has Tramadol it will help with his end stage pain.

Boo Boo is home and so am I, for how long, days, weeks. I have been told that anger is part of acceptance when dealing with illness and death. I have been angry for a long time about the poor breeding practices that have been the cause of every one of Boo Boo’s illnesses along with my shih tzu who passed away last year. Of course there is guilt, not rational by any means it started with the PRA, some how I must be responsible for his blindness, at least I should be able to make it better. Right now I am feeling a sense of powerlessness, dread and sadness. It is very hard to accept what I can not change. I am taking time to just stay home with him lying by me. I hate good byes. I will take Yogi and Misty to their classes tonight and DH will sit with Boo Boo. When Boo Boo moans or cry’s out both Hav’s run over and nose him to see what is wrong. Misty has taken to sleeping beside him, brave girl lying next to a blind dog.

I know this is part of the cycle, I also know how important it is to remember as our dogs age that we not see them as wizened and useless but remember that they are the same puppy that entertained us endlessly all those years ago. I dread the loss and the deep sadness that is already encroaching. So what is the big deal, my dogs are not my whole world, but when I look into the eyes of my dog I know I am his whole world, that is a heady feeling. I really dread endings and hate good bye so I hope that when the time comes Boo Boo will be ok with a simple adieu.
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Robbie, Boo Boo, Yogi, and Misty's human.
Poohkey miss you, monkey.
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post #2 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 02:53 PM
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your post brought tears to my eyes and sorrow to my heart.
Praying for strength, wisdom and peace for you and your family.

Tammy and Tillie
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post #3 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 03:00 PM
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I am sad for Boo Boo's pain and yours. It is so difficult to see our beloveds in pain. My heart is with you.

LaMontaña Havanese
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post #4 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 03:05 PM
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Oh, Robbie, I feel so bad for you. It is never easy to lose one of our furry family members, and when it is a prolonged decline like you've been through with Boo Boo, somehow it seems even harder.

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post #5 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 03:15 PM
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This is so sad, my heart goes out to you, and dear Boo Boo.I hope that when the inevitable happens, it is peaceful and calm,and you can rest assured that you have done all in your power to ease Boo Boo's passage.

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post #6 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 04:40 PM
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This makes me so sad. I'm not good with goodbyes, even other people's. Wishing you the best.

Tracy and Brody

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
- Josh Billings
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post #7 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 04:40 PM
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By the time I got to the end of your post, you had me crying. As many here know, I just went through this with my Lacey in November. A part of me is afraid of the beginning, knowing how short the years in between are before our beloved pets have completed their life cycle. Take this time, painful as it is, to love Boo Boo. Say all the things you need to say. Cry all the tears that well up in your eyes, knowing there is little else we can do when it's their turn to leave.

I see it coming once again with Lacey's sister, Cagney. She seems to be going downhill just the last week or so and she's breaking my heart. I, like you, don't know how to say goodbye. Sending you and your Boo Boo heart felt hugs.

<b>Just Milo and me, and . . . </b>Bailey makes three . . . until Ruby said, "hey, what about me?"
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post #8 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 04:54 PM
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Knowing the end is near and it is almost time to say goodbye to a beloved pet is so difficult. I have been where you are too many times with dogs, cats, and birds. It never gets easier and the "what-if's" and "if only's" are tough. Know that our pets don't know if they were well bred, or badly bred, and in the end it doesn't matter. You love them, they love you. That's all that matters. You have done everything you could do so cherish the time you have and when it's time for him to go, just tell him you love him, and that simple adieu will be perfect.


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post #9 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 04:58 PM
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Since my surgery all I do is cry and today is no different. I can't even express how I feel for you--just know that I do and will think of you often. Lucile
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post #10 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-08-2011, 05:18 PM
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I'm so sorry you are going through this. Hard to find words of comfort.

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