Out of sight, but not mind - Havanese Forum : Havanese Forums
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-11-2016, 11:30 AM Thread Starter
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Out of sight, but not mind

Loki is fine if he can see me - whether I am in the same room or in the kitchen which he can see either if he is in his ex pen/crate or free in the family room but blocked from the rest of the house by the baby gate. But OMG should I leave the family room or the kitchen to go to the bathroom, the basement, living room or upstairs, he barks, whines and cries the whole time I am gone whether its 2 minutes or 40 minutes. He knows the difference if I leave the house. We have a small old house so he can hear me walking around.

I feel terrible but he has to get used to it. I can't feed him or give him treats every time I leave the room. I will save his breakfast Kong for when I go shower before work but that doesn't always work timing wise on the weekend.

Help. I have to remember he is only 13 weeks today. Do I just let him bark or is there something else I can try? He can go for a long time.
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-11-2016, 12:18 PM
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Separation issues are best remedied by preventative methods at an early age. Many people make the mistake of not incorporating gradual departures from the day they get their pups. Pat Miller has a good article on how to do all this Taking Measures to Prevent Separation Anxiety Related Behaviors | Whole Dog Journal

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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-11-2016, 03:32 PM
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Great article, Dave! We had two breeders tell us they wouldn't sell us a Havanese puppy because we are gone for work from 6 AM to 4 PM during the school year. That was despite us telling them we'd be having a dog walker take Shama out and play with her mid-day during our absences. Luckily, we met a breeder who is a retired educator who thought we would be good Havanese owners. All that to say that we knew that this breed loves to be with its people and is prone to separation anxiety so we took steps to alleviate SA from the beginning. Our comings and goings are without excitement. It's hard (for us), but we don't even say goodbye. We just disengage/ignore for a while then exit. Shama just stays in her 2x6-foot ex pen. When we come home, she's excited to see us, but we ignore her for a while then give her attention only when she sits. We're happy that she seems to be well adjusted. She doesn't make any noise when we come home. Our dog walker (a graduate student at a nearby school) was a rock star this year too. She'd come in (Shama quiet) and make her lunch and eat her lunch and eventually greet Shama and take her outside then play with her. Before leaving, she'd put Shama back in her pen and putz around for a while before not saying goodbye and leaving. It's counterintuitive to not make a big deal out of coming and going, but we think our dog is healthier for it. Barbara, I think the article Dave recommended would be a good starting point for you. (I should add that we've been surprised that now that we're giving Shama more freedom - access to the whole house when we're home, including doors open that used to be closed - she doesn't always want to be with us. She moves about from spot to spot in the living and dining rooms, lying on the dining room floor to look out the sliding glass door, lying at the top of the stairs to look at the front door, lying in the hallway, etc. We thought she would be clingier than she is.) Current photo of Shama attached. Good luck with Loki! He will be happier once he gets it that he's OK when you leave because you will always return.
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 07-11-2016, 08:06 PM Thread Starter
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Dave - Thanks. This is a good article. I wish I had read it before he came home. I would have spent the first 2 days following the routine. I think I will try it this weekend. It might be too late since I have to work this week. I do have the dog sitter coming in 2x a day. He is quiet when she gets here and she leaves him with a frozen kong that I leave.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-04-2016, 09:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by davetgabby View Post
Separation issues are best remedied by preventative methods at an early age. Many people make the mistake of not incorporating gradual departures from the day they get their pups. Pat Miller has a good article on how to do all this Taking Measures to Prevent Separation Anxiety Related Behaviors | Whole Dog Journal
This article has been invaluable since my puppy came home a few days ago! Thanks Dave! She's doing great with this approach!
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