Ok. Several things. First, she is a puppy, with puppy energy levels. TINY puppies sleep a lot, but as they grow, they sleep less and play more. Especially where she is confined for a large part of each day, it's not surprising that she's loaded for bearwhen tou get home. This isn't an ideal situation, but others have made it work. You will have to be patient for a while (a fairly long while) until she grows upand settles down... She will eventually!
In the mean time, it would help her AND you if you could find a day care situation for her at least a few days per week so that she could expend her energy in play with other dogs. My personal preference would be for an in-home daycare with just a few other small dogs to play with. But some people on the board have found more traditional daycare facilities that they are happy with.
As far as nights are concerned, personally, I would not tolerate this. She needs to learn to SLEEPat night. It is NOT play-time. I would put her in her crate and TOTALLY ignore her. No hand through the bars, no sympathy, not even a harsh reproach. All of those are attention, good or bad, and that's exactly what she's looking for. Your smart little bugger is training YOU and ou need to turn things around.
If you want to have her in the room with you, you're going to have some bad nights until she believes that you mean it. (and you and your husband can't give in even ONCE!!!) This does not sound at all like a puppy with separation issues... This is a puppy who has learned to manipulate you already. These guys are SMART!!! If it were me, assuming that she doesn't need to go out to potty during the night, I would move her crate away from your sleeping area, and let her carry on as long as she wants to, but where it's not so disruptive to your sleep. She WILL eventually learn to sleep independently... You justhave to steel ourselves to be firm and consistent!
If she can't make it through the night without pottying, I would STILL set her up to sleep somewhere where she won't disturb you, but I'd put her crate (or bed) inside her ex-pen with some sort of indoor pot option in the pen with her. i use a litter box for Kodi, but a pee pad, UgoDog or whatever you choose is fine.